I hate my voice. I hate every single thing sound it makes. I hate its pitch. I hate its volume. I hate its - everything. At this moment in time all I want is to never hear it again. Is that too much to ask??!
Dad is utterly selfish and has decided that because he spends so little time with me I must talk to him constantly. I don't have that much to say normally. Let alone when I never want to speak again! And I can't even talk quietly because he's stupidly deaf!
The rest of my family don't have a clue. So I have to talk to them as well.
My friends are constantly trying to convince me to talk and so are the others at school. They. Just. Don't. Get. It.
The teachers, like my family, couldn't even be approached with the idea of me not talking. It's the same at work. Even random strangers expect me to talk!
Why is it so inconceivable that a 15 year old girl would one day decide not to talk?? It's not like anyone on the internet is even remotely helpful either!! If you look up ways to destroy your vocal cords, you get lots of people wanting to and loads of others saying "why would you want to do that?" and having a go at the people! The only way I can find is surgery. AT 15 I CAN'T AFFORD THAT!!!!
No-one, absolutely no-one seems to understand voluntary muteness and no-one will help you find out how to become a physical mute. It's ridiculous! Why is the whole world so against it? It's OUR voice and OUR choice! Thousand of people have died so that we have the free will to make these kinds of choices. But does anyone respect them? No! Why shouldn't we get a say in whether or not we have to hear OUR OWN voices?
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