Perfection Is A LIE

I'm not the prettiest or the funniest or the smartest or the best at anything. In fact, if you put me with my friends (including those I'm deliberatly drifting away from) - you won't notice me at all. I had two things that I could do though. Writing and history.
History was good because there's this one girl at school. She's the Perfect One. And she was always better than me at everything. And I was doing so well, getting all A*s in my mocks, coming top of the class, being two marks away from perfection.I was the best student my teacher had ever had. And then, it disappeared. She's the perfect one. And I'm back where I was before - invisible.
It's frustrating because I've always wanted to be good at something. I've always wanted to be appreciated and loved for who I am. This was one small victory. I was good at something.
And as for my writing, if you've read any of my blog posts you'll see how pathetic I am at that. Especially if you read my other one where I was meant to be convincing people my house was haunted and after one post I deleted it because it was so shit.
So I decided then and there, I had to kill her. I didn't care how. I just wanted her gone.
I wish. I know I'm just jealous and it's quite petty. But I can't help but feel I've been replaced. And as if I'm now useless and unwanted and alone.
I can make myself go unseen if I need to. I'm the invisible one. That's my only talent. Making people not see me. But I don't really try with that. Mostly I just be with other people, that way no-one would want to look at me.
And the problem is, I hate being invisible. I'm sick of hearing about how everyone's better than me at everything. And I'm really sick of smiling and congratulating them like a kind, caring friend I'm meant to be.
I'm not going to lie, I get compliments. But only from my friends. And they're lies. Despite the title, that's the lie. Any good thing anyone ever accidentally thought about me. They're see through lies.
The other lies, i.e. perfection, are so hard to find. Because the imperfection (the fact that these "perfect" people are ruthless bitches!) is so well hidden. At least I'm honest. I get that I'm fucking awful. And I gave up on trying to be better.
I just get so, so sick of being the only one without a talent. Some people are good at everything. And some only have one thing. I only had one thing. But now I'm back to none. No talents, no personality, no looks. What on earth do I have thats worth living for? I'm a fucking fail of a person. No-one would give a shit if I disappeared. I doubt they'd even notice. I tried to drown myself in the bath today. But I stopped when an alam went off on my phone. If only I hadn't stopped ....
Never mind, I'm going to stop whining and find an excuse to not be seen with my pretty, funny, smart, perfect "friends" (I hate them for an entirely different reason) so that I might get some recognotion once or twice in my life.